I wonder if you know that I am only trying to push you away. None of this is real. I want you to say, something came up, let's meet another time. It would be easier to handle than this mess. Because I go back and forth, wanting you, not wanting you. Being annoyed by you, being surprised by you. Back and forth, and it's so much easier when someone else makes the choice for me. I do not need you yet, and I never want to get to that point.

The girl said, sometimes people stay. But I won't. Stay. The boy said, being with you was great. We had so much fun together, we had the best conversations. There was a wistful look in his eye, like he was remembering a fond memory.

Ten years from now, you and I will be sitting in a cafe and you will ask if I ever loved you, and I will look wistful at a memory and say no, I didn't, but I wish I had. I don't know what you would say.