This is when I'm supposed to notice that maybe things are not going in a good direction. Staying up past midnight on purpose, inappropriate sex, wanting to reach out to people and changing my mind and choosing to isolate instead. Making plans to throw away opportunities that are given to me.  Not letting people help me. Here is an opportunity to do things differently.

Today could be the first day of the rest of my life if I don't screw all this shit up... like I always do...